Now THAT makes me smile

This is such a classic picture. ;-D

Another one bites the dust...

Tomorrow would have been 3 years since I’ve called anyone my boyfriend. But I just couldn’t make it. Nick asked if he could call me his girlfriend this weekend. He beat me to the punch, as I later told him that as my date to my company Christmas party this Friday, I wanted to make sure he was comfortable with however it was I introduced him.

It feels great, and I already felt like his girlfriend, it wasn’t like it was with Tony, the way I hesitated for 5 minutes to answer him because, essentially, I wasn’t sure I wanted to be in a relationship with him. But Nick is wonderful. Kind, intelligent, energetic, though sometimes withdrawn or quiet while he careful over thinks the situation going on around him or some memory that came to mind. Our personalities seem to balance each other well, so far anyway. He’s easy to please as am I, but he can seem uptight or rigid about things, I can’t really think of any specific examples, because it doesn’t bother me, but my relaxed nature I think feeds his ability to relax more.

We like to dance and listen to different music, but our tastes cross on some styles, thankfully! I think he’ll open me up to new things as I hope to do for him. But I’ll never dance to 80’s music with the pant-ripping fervor he does, nor will he ever shake his booty to the latest club hits like I do. But…that’s what makes it interesting and hopefully, a strong relationship.

We’re both incredibly passionate and caring for one another.

There’s something there, that I think he picked up on when I sorta bugged out on Saturday night. He’s so open with his past experiences, but he did say himself once, he’s no angel. And I wonder if perhaps he could be a flirt of my own level. Totally harmless, but again, I guess I like to know I’m the center of attention but now that I’m in a relationship, that’s something I’m going to have to get over. He has female friends, he has exes, he has loved someone enough to be very, very hurt. I hope, I guess, that he feels that way for me at some point.

The newness is a little scary to me, but the kind of scared that makes me want to dive in head first, take hold of the situation so that I understand it…I guess not really control it…but control myself within it.

I could say it’s been so long since I’ve felt this way, but I wonder if maybe I’ve never felt this way. All I know is that it takes a great deal of control to not smile like a complete idiot when I talk about him, and to not run up to complete strangers and tell them I found someone so fantastic, that I, me, AMY NAESER, am dating him exclusively. I’m proud and happy and lucky to have him in my life and I’m eating up every second of this new and amazing feeling so that I will never forget how it should feel.

Party a little too hardy

Wow, what a weekend. I had a Halloween party Saturday that was thrown by me and my neighbor. There was drama, people having sex on my roommate's floor (neighbors friends, not minw...) then the kegs got kicked at 11 pm, then there was vodka and tequila shots and..oy vey. I kissed a gay guy. Then i found picutures on my guys camera of him and this cute blond chick from last Friday...and they looked pretty friendly. I cried, my sister egged me on, i couldn't wake my guy up cuz he was passed out so i confronted him first thing in the morning. He says they're just friends.
This was after my guy friend Rick pegged him as a guy that would cheat, and my sister heard reports of a girl up in his neck being kissy, and also after a girl kept talking to me about how attractive he was.
Anyway...i like him, i trust that they are just friends because I have no reason to believe otherwise, no evidence that it's anything more. At the same time, i did reply to 2 emails on match last week...you just never know. All my eggs in one basket this early on is just not smart for me, so I'm keeping options open.

On the up side, one of my best friends, mike and his GF, Kate came. He had lied to her about our past. That a couple extremely drunken and emotional nights had turned physical, and she was obviously hurt. But she came right up to me and said that her and I were good and she looked forward to being friends. I truly hope we can be. It was great seeing all of my friends together again having an awesome time though. From now on, however, no neighbors freinds. I wasn't a big fan of many of them. And i like having a crazy night every now and then, but enjoy responsible evenings with friends as well. I see a responsible, more settled Amy in my near future. I hope. :o)

Halloween at work was fun. One woman dressed up as the crazy NASA chick who was in the news for trying to kill the woman dating her BF, or Ex BF, or whatever it was. The stories in the news said the woman (Lisa Nowak) even wore diapers on her drive to TX, so she wouldn't have to stop, the woman at work also wore a diaper sticking out of her suit, it was the funniest thing! She deservingly won first prize. Two guys dressed up as bumbs, complete with beer smell, they won 2nd place and a Dumbledore from harry potter won 3rd. It was a blast, and i got to practice my costume for Saturday.

Saturday's party is going to be a blast. My neighbor and i have at least 50 people coming, hope it's a warm night! My friend Batti (sarah) has a friend in a band who is going to come play in my basement....not sure home much room there will be for party guests....but i'm sure we'll be able to hear upstairs just fine :) cannot wait!

slightly hung-over...but who cares!!!

Navy Ball

Cinderella

So what i want to know is how CNG can charge $164 in ADDITION to my $34 monthly gas bill to renew my "Service contract." F that...Grrrrrrr. I have to pay, so that i can pay them for my gas. wtf. b@stards.

On a happier note, I had another date with Navy boy Wednesday. He asked me what I was doing next Friday, and clearly was holding back on why he was asking. About two hours later, when i'd completely forgotten about his question, he asks me if i have a dress. Odd question I thought to myself.

"Of course, I'm a girl, I have several dresses," I say.

"Well, the reason I ask," he began "is because next Friday is the Navy ball."
-End of sentence- i think i almost pee-d myself at that point. He's never been to one himself because he was either away at sea, or single...he says. heheheh!!
oh, and did i mention his MOTHER is going to be in town Thursday through Tuesday that weekend???? ~gulp~

SOOO EXCITED!!!!! Fortunately, I can re-use the dress i wore in my sister's wedding. Hope it fits. yipes.

Mood: Very Happy

It's been several weeks since I've written...my oh my.

I'll try to make it a quick review!

1) quit Express. last day is tonight...I'm scheduled for more, but i have a presentation Monday a.m. and I'll be in NYC for a big client presentation Tuesday...so OH WELL!!!
2) I met an amazing, sweet, attractive (to put it all lightly) guy through Match.com . We've met 3 times, it's been fantastic. Beyond butterflies, I got chills last night. I could go on, but we'll take it one day at a time. He's joining me for my friends corn maze event on Saturday, and he wants me to go to breakfast with him first. And I can't wait

okay...back to work!!

Rainy Tuesday

Blew off SBM...he kept wanting to stay over though I told him he couldn't, so I felt very taken advantage of. So that’s done.
Haven’t heard from DB since our very nice evening last week. I knew I nick-named him DB for a reason.....
My neighbor and I are throwing a HUGE Halloween party Nov. 3. :) YAY!!!!
I was considering joining match.com, but taking the attitude my friends have taken...it’s just another way to meet all types of people, and I’m going to meet a lot of idiots first, some friends, some whackos, but ya never know? Right?? Still thinking about it.....

Mrs. Right Now

I know that to SBM, I am the affection, companionship and objective support that he needs...right now. Mrs....Right now.

To DB, I am the one that got away, his "DOH!" girl. The one that brought him a choice a year and a half ago, and he made the wrong one. And now, he wants to be a bachelor (I think??) and yet persues me. Mrs. "A-Year-ago-who-might-be-the-perfect-mrs.-right-now"

All so frustrating, but at least SBM wants to go out, go paintballing, go fishing with me, at least he can maybe be my MR. right now too.

...what else is new...

I know, I know, I talk way too much about dating, but it's just so much more fun to talk about than work, and those are the only two things I really have going on right now.

Last night I went to DB's house. He grilled chicken on the grill while I made the salad and while we both drank sam's oktoberfest (yuuummmmm). It was a beautiful night and we sat on his deck and jibbered while we ate. Talked a little about our past, how he couldn't believe he was still talking to me because of what he did two years ago (told me that he, basically, loved me...but was going to try to work things out with his LT girlfriend...who moved just this past May/June).

I forgave him, but at the same time, I need a fresh start. I'd like to get to know him instead of being just a long time aquantance.

So...after we cleaned up dinner, we stood on the deck and looked at the clear sky and stars for a while, and kissed. It was actually pretty perfect. I know I could have stayed longer and nothing would have really happened, but I left not long after that. My brain is still talking way louder than my heart on this one. And also, he needed to be told that last night counted as night #1...those nights when I was left under his false pretenses do NOT count as dates. FRESH start, plus....he's never had his time to be a bachelor...ever...and i'm just so tired of being Mrs. right now. I'd rather be left alone completely.

We'll see

crappy date, amazing vacation

So the date went pretty poorly, entirely due to the random, out of nowhere, off the wall comment "I'm not looking for a girlfriend." Did I say I was applying for the position?? Anyway, not worth wasting time expressing how many ways that frustrated me.

SBM is still...SBM. Haven't seen him, but surely will within the next few days.

Tonight...I'm going to spend time with DB, believe it or not, and i'm looking forward to seeing someone I've known for as long as him, yet have spent such little time with. We're going to eat pizza, drink beer and watch a movie, and I really can't think of anything else I'd rather do. (besides go back to the lake) which was AWESOME! I'm tan! a little bruised from all the outdoor activity that took place under the influence.
I'm a little bloated from all the beer and junkfood, but all in all, an incredible weekend with incredibly wonderful friends.

Maybe I'll blog more later about the weekend, it was great.

VACATION & A DATE

Well, let's just say last night was a testament to everyone who knows someone who's going through a divorce. Being a good friend is one thing, but keeping physical or emotional attraction out of the picture is decidedly the best way to proceed (as well as with CAUTION!)

SO MOVING ON...
"The lake" is coming up this weekend already and I couldn't be any more ready for it. A group of the best friends I've ever had, my sister, lots of beer, swimming, reading and relaxing. And the weather is going to be awesome.

TONIGHT...
I have a date :) we are meeting at the Waterbury mall. I have no idea what to expect. He's very quiet over the phone and email, but he is a guy. I'm just hoping its amazing and spectacular and that I feel butterflies and warm fuzziness all over. that's a lot of pressure for a first date, I know, but i will take what I can get.

I'll update my breathless audience tomorrow on all the happenings of my night.

Has it happened?

It's been so long since I wrote last, but would like to start up again. My life has changed completely in the last year. I bought a condo on my own. Began a new and wonderful job. I've become very satisfied with my life as it stand and am completely confident that I am were I am supposed to be at this time in my life.

My sister is thinking about starting a family this fall, both an exciting and almost unreal event. Most of my friends are either married, engaged, living with their significant other or have recently found someone new and loaded with incredible amounts of potential.

I've met countless men and guys, both jerks and sweethearts, over the last three years and none have come close to what I want or need. Some "superficial" things that the person I end up with should have, such as a bachelors degree, a career, little or no baggage (mental or physical), looks, charm, sense of humor, desire for a family, a positive family life...umm...and I could continue, but I think it's clear what I am essentially waiting for.

At this time, I am more or less seeing one person(SBM), just met another (smitten), and am apparently still in the eyes of a few others, some that had chances that they did not take (DB), others hoping to have theirs...

I leave all my thoughts, desires and wishes to the plan that's been laid out for me. It will happen if it is meant to happen, with whomever it's meant to happen with, when it is time. And I'll know exactly when and where that moment is the second I fall into it.

Has it happened?